Thursday, December 07, 2006 @ 10:42 PM
I admit that i have not been blogging for sometime.It is just that nowadays i feel so tired to blog.I am tired,real tired.Physically and mentally , I am tired all over.So much pressure from everything in my life.Can't things be like 'happy go lucky' way.It is easier this way.Why must people get angry over small things and complicate it.
Yes,this is the reason why we have problems in our life.Everything is simple it is just human's nature to complicate things and make it worst.Now I am facing big problems at home.Parents are not supportive,relationship between siblings are also widening because of the pressure given by the parents.
I want this to stop but i cannot stop it.Not with all the emotions flying around my head,I can't even think straight anymore.Whenever I think too much into things I will tell myself :'You're thinking too much'.Then i will stop.Thank god I am able to control my thinking if not I will be so down now.
Band camp ended yesterday.Though many things were not planned out nicely but I enjoyed myself.Really showed the bonds between every section.This is a good thing.Our skit was nice.=).Totally enjoyed embarassing myself with the gay actions.However the main thing is that everyone laughed at it.Laughter,The Best Medicine.
Home.A place truely ours and a place where we can go to when we are in troubles.But in my case , there's no such thing as home.Whenever I am home,there is bound to be scoldings,even if the things that are wrong seems so small,my parents will make me feel so bad that I even had the thought of ending my life.The pressure is rising each day and each day it gets worst.I do not know how long I will be able to hang on.I really hope I can let go of everything but there are people that I love and cherish.I wun want to go and lose everything.
Yesterday,I had a wonderful 20mins or so at a station.Even if it is for 20mins,I was truely happy for once since a long time.We chatted and I was really feeling down at that time but after the talk I was feeling much better and it really made my day.I am happy everytime I am around this person.To me,little gestures of care and concern really matters.It might seem small and does not cost much but it is these little gestures that gives comfort to people.I am happy.Truely.
I want to thank you but I can't write your name.Hope you are reading this.'Thank you!'.
